Alright, be honest, how good is this?

It's good, but it sounds sorta dull. For example, "Packets of yellow papers fell out of it, but he didn’t give them his attention nor did he seem to care. They swirled around and fluttered away as the wind picked up, but Mr. Hartman didn’t bother chase after them." I don't know how to explain it, but try like, try putting more action, emotion, something.